If any of you are keeping up with Mad Men, which is one of my favourite shows of all time, you’ll know that Betty Draper could use as much help as she can get. Whether she was a clueless child herself or a heartless bitch, she’s never had the qualities that make a great caregiver. So, in an effort to be extra creative, I invite you on a journey down Taylor’s train of thought.
Don: Why are the kids watching this?
Betty: What am I supposed to do, Don? Am I supposed to keep it from them?
1. She could use a bath
Let’s be real, this woman his high strung. I bet a bit of Tisty Totsy and some Mother Superior would do this women wonders. If she had a little me time to relax I bet she’d be a little more empathetic to Sally’s needs. I mean, besides shooting some birds, what has she every really done well for her kids.
2. Massaging the warmth back into her heart
Betty is the kind of gal who gets her panties in a knot if they are on for too long. Don could always appease her with a little loving and I bet she’d really appreciate a massage bar, the aroma might calm her nerves and getting a massage from Henry might help her retract her claws. Give her a bit of Each Peach without peach, and see what happens.
3. Lip Scrubbing away her fangs
Betty is like a vampire who likes to suck the joy out of everyones life, and I bet that those fangs are nasty to her lips. Softer lips could lead to softer words and we know that Sally and Bobby would like that, plus they have popcorn flavour… sooooo.
Don’t you dare lie to me, I’ll cut your fingers off!
4. Keeping her blonde blonde
Aging must be killing this superficial diva, and not only because her racism, sexism and prejudice won’t fly in the new age. So Marilyn hair mask will probably cheer her up a bit too to ensure that her fake blonde stays vibrant.
She’s taken to your tools like a little lesbian.
5. Clearing away her hatred
Maybe clearing her sinuses and inhaling some positivity with some Tea Tree Steamer Tabs will exhale the sass right out of her.
Needless to say Betty Draper has some work to do. As for you, I doubt anyone could make you any nicer.
Bobby: She really likes you.
Betty: Yeah, well that blouse says she likes everyone.
Love you lushies
xox Over and Out,